I want to share with you today some pretty dope idea. I want to write about taking things for granted versus pursuing your goals. I think in every part of life you have to stay in balance. Life is not binary, it’s not only black or white it has a hundred millions of colors. Now, let’s focus on three sources that I have inspired me to write this article.
So… You want to complain?
I very admire Gary Vaynerchuck. He’s one of the most inspirational guy on the internet. I admire his energy, positivity and life wisdom. In this video he talks about taking life for granted. The odds of being human is incredibly low, like 400 trillion to 1, so our life is a precious gift that we need to appreciate. Bad stuff happen, but there always can be much worse. If we are healthy physically and mentally, we have no right to complain, everything depends on us. He talks that we need to appreciate what we have, be positive and don’t give a fuck about the little bad situations.
This idea is very wise. We, as humans constantly aren’t fulfilled, we always moan about some bad things that are happening to us. We are taking good things that we have for granted, and that’s why we don’t use our potential that we have. Complaining is useless activity, and by complaining we are putting blame outside of us. We don’t blame ourselves for our actions, and we don’t take responsibility for our lives. The key is taking responsibility for yourself, and that’s why Gary encourages everybody to do.
Maybe it’s okay to take things for granted?
Yeah, it is a fact that we do it constantly, I think it is wired in our DNA. Juliana Breines from Psychology Today is talking about this idea.
Most of the time, we take life for granted. We don’t stop to consider what a miracle it is that we were even born in the first place, or recognize that each moment could be our last. Taken to an extreme, this mindset can lead us to behave in careless ways, to mistreat the people we care about, and to fail to say or do what is really in our hearts. But taking life—and all the good things in life—for granted once in awhile isn’t necessarily something we should feel bad about. It may even be essential to our mental health.
Research on adult attachment styles, for example, shows that people who feel secure in their relationships and don’t worry about losing their partners tend to have healthier, happier relationships and fewer psychological problems. In contrast, people who are more acutely aware of the possibility of losing their partners tend to suffer psychologically and romantically. Less secure people may actually be more in touch with reality–when it comes to fidelity and relationship longevity, the odds (link is external) are not really in our favor. But being in touch with reality isn’t necessarily what makes us happier.
In relationships, occasionally reminding ourselves of “the facts” is not without its benefits. It can help us appreciate how precious our time with our partner is, and it can protect us from being blindsided if a relationship doesn’t work out. But too much of it may also prevent us from experiencing the simple, almost childlike pleasure of feeling like a good moment will never end, whether it takes place on a lazy Sunday afternoon or while traveling the world together.
So in other words, this behavior can benefit our life and our relationships. I encourage you to read entire post.
So, why exactly we are taking things for granted?
To understand a source of this behavior we can use information from thetadprinciple.com blog. Author describes taking things for granted in this manner:
In part, taking things for granted is a function of habituation. When something is new, it stands out from the “background” and we pay lots of attention to it. When the novelty wears off, however, its hold on our attention weakens and we move on to something else. This is a natural tendency rooted in survival instincts, and usually happens without us realizing it.
When we don’t pay sufficient attention to something, we underestimate its value and forget to be grateful. We let it sink to the bottom of the toy box, so to speak, until we are threatened with its removal. This is ironic, since the things we are most likely to take for granted are what we value most, such as our livelihoods and loved ones. We fool ourselves into thinking they will always be there when we need them, so we get blindsided when we lose them. And, once they are gone, we can’t help but think of all the time we could have spent paying attention to them and valuing them. This causes our sense of loss to become magnified through the lens of regret and self-recrimination, pulling us into the past to dwell and ruminate.
Author of this post encourage us though, to get rid of that habit, by cultivating awareness and grounding yourself in the present moment.
Taking things for granted is nothing bad, it’s human nature to always pursue something. Yes, think in perspective like Gary says but only when you are upset or depressed or something.
The thing is to constantly feel good, to keep your positivity. Taking that perspective and feeling gratitude is very important when you are overreacting over your mistake and you are constantly making yourself miserable when you aren’t in some place that you wanted to be. If you want something, go get it, but don’t be miserable if you don’t have it already, make yourself positive.
So, in my opinion these things must be balanced. If we wouldn’t have pursuing nature, a human wouldn’t leave the cave few hundred thousand years ago. It’s our nature and we must accept it, and I think that in order to live a happy life, you need to constantly improve yourself and go further and further in life. But, life is ruthless and there won’t be much situations that occured as you wished. In this case stay positive and focus on the things you accomplished already to not make yourself miserable.
Always go for positivity. Peace!